Zhang Zongchang - "The dogmeat general"

Zhang Zongchang was a chinese warlord in the 20th century. Times magazine names him "Chinas basest general".

He was nicknamed "The dogmeat general", because he was very fond of gambling, particularly a game called Pai Gow. Pai Gow, in northeastern china is known as "Eating dogmeat".

Born in Laizhou, he joined a bandit gang in 1911, and offered his forces to the military. Because of this, he quickly rose to power. He employed Russian mercanaries in his armies, to man armoured trains. He also employed 4,500 Russian mercenaries, forming a cavalry with them, and had fake Tsar uniforms. He also employed a regiment of Russian nurses, and made them train the rest of his army, so when they got injured in combat, they could do first aid on themselves.

After defeating the army of Wu Peifu, he absorbed the army into his own. He let the enemy keep their original ranks. He promoted his original officers, but there was not enough gold and silver for their star insignia so he ordered them to be made from the papers from ciggarette packets. During the mass award ceremony, officers were suprised to learn that Their insignia had torn during the ceremony.

During one of his campaigns, he announced that he would win the battle, or come home in a coffin. He retreated from that battle, so he came home paraded through the streets sitting in a coffin, smoking a large cigar. He also kept his elderly mother with him at all times, (To act as an advisor) except when he was on a campaign.


Zhang has also written poetry. Here is are two poems i find amusing.

Pray for rain

The sky god is also named Zhang
Why does he make life hard for me
If it doesn't rain in three days
I'll demolish your temple
Then I'll have cannons bombard your mom

Visiting Pengai Pavillion

What a pavilion
Place is fucking nice
If the gods can get here
I’ll take a seat too
Have a drink by the window
Sing some songs to the ocean
Play some cards
I think I’ll get drunk